Saturday, June 13, 2009

So Herenton is Running for Congress

There are many other bloggers out there who are much more politically active than I am and who do a much better job of analyzing politics than I do so I'm not even going to try and step on their toes.

All I have is my opinion and I'm usually not afraid to share it.

Right out of high school I moved to Kansas to work with and become a professional horse trainer. Growing up in Henderson TN we had horses and I loved--still do--to ride. All of that means that I've shoveled some shit in my day and learned to recognize it. I even learned to tell a sick horse from a healthy one by the content and consistency of the shit.

Let me tell you something folks, based on the content and consistency of Herenton's shit, he's one sick muther. There's something mental going on here. Something maniacal. Based on a close examination of his shit, it's become apparent that he'll eat anything fed to him by his posse. Which means, it comes back out.

He's become a characature, a cartoon. Every time he opens his mouth, all I hear are bells, whistles, honks and snorts. How do we take him seriously when he strips to his boxers and crawls into a boxing ring to trade punches with another over-the-hill boxer who has also stripped to his boxers? How do we take him seriously when he fathers an out of wedlock baby in his 60's? Has the FOOL not heard of STD's, AIDS or protection? How do we take his ability to make decisions in the heat of the moment or an emergency situation when he can't pause long enough to wrap the wand? What the hell do we think he'd do in a major storm? Oh, wait...we know that. He goes to Little Rock to raise some money.

My bad. I forgot for a moment.

How do we take him seriously when he continues to put total gomers in positions of authority over important divisions of the city? Joseph Lee? Yolanda McFadden? Loraine Essex? Good lord, what decisions would he make as our congressman?

What about his flipflops on the superintendent? "Hell no on Kriner Cash. I'm the best man for the job." Then, "Hey, Kriner's cool. I didn't really mean what I said."

Joseph's in, Joseph's out, Joseph's in, Joseph's out, Joseph's resigned but now is assistant at the Parks department.

That must have been a helluva blowjob.

He's become a sad, disillusioned man and I feel for him. I suspect that he's had unprotected sex one too many times because he's showing symptoms of some ugly STD. Trot on down to the Health Department and get yo'self checked out Mr. Mayor. Your lack of judgement is showing and it's embarrasing.

I feel sorry for him. He needs help and none of his friends will tell him so. He's lost touch. He's ruined this city. The damage he's done will take years to fix.


verlindahenning said...

It wouldn't matter if his friends did tell him so--do you honestly believe he'd listen?

Your theory may not be far off--but then again, it could be all that nose trouble he's had over the years (sniff, sniff, snort).

Breckrider said...

Sniff sniff is right!